Sleep....sleep....sleeP

Yesterday, i had my presentation early in the morning. Who knows?? When we got there at 9.45am sharp, then our class rep announced that the lecturer will be late for an hour. And we will start our presentation at around 11.00am. OMG !! It's not the 1st time for her to be late!! Through out the whole semester, she either late or cancelled the class. Can you all imaging that we got up early in the morning and attend her class sharp at 10am and she will late or cancel her class. So terrible, horrible, vegetable......

Arhhh!! After the presentation, we actually still have two more classes in the afternoon, but, we went home to change cloths and had our lunch. Later in the class, i felt very sleepy and no more energy and mood to study. However, i kept on stay in the class till the end.

After 5pm, i went home and took a bath, and straight went to the bed and sleep. At 1st, i was thinking to sleep till dinner, but then, by the time when i open my eyes, its already early in the morning.

Ohhh NO !! Yesterday i was waiting them to woke me up for my dinner and then no one is knocking my doors. But never mind, i quite enjoyed the sleeping feeling.

Today, when i re-see my housemates, they, one-by-one, come and tell me that they finally see me as i was in my bed for over 12hours. Har?? Ohhh!! They were knocking my doors, calling me like mad and i couldn't hear anything. Haha, sleeping over 12hours is my 2nd experience in my life and my 1st time in here,Kampar. 1st time is in PJ, sunday. That day, after my dinner, I also slept from 7pm to the next day 8am. Wahhh! Wonderful sleep. Suddenly, i feel quite impress of myself because i will never sleep like this. I will think that sleeping too long will waste my time and now the miracle happened in me to let me rest after the heavy assignment and stressful mid-term exam.

If i call the mid-term exam(Small test that are more more and quite easy exam for us to past) as stressful, what should i call my final exam?? Izzit that i should feel very very very very very stressful, panic?? Haiz.....Think what should i do for now but not think so far.. Still have 1month, enjoy the life here !!

Confidence...???

It had been a long time i din blog at here. Because of rushing for assignments and the mid-term are coming continuously. The non-stop exam wave keep on go around me...Feel so stressful...

Did i just mention "stress"?? I have never experience stress before since i get into secondary school, university. Finally and lastly i know how a stress will affect people and how the feeling is when people face stress. Its very suffering when the stress is coming.

Duno why.... I'm just too worried about my study. I know there will be nothing that will be 100% perfect but I just want to make it to the optimun level that i can achieve. That's why this is the 1st time i experience stress. Last time when i saw people study very stressful, i cant understand their situation, i feel that, "It just an exam, what for make yourself so stress till your mother also cant recognise??" Now the situation had changed. Its my turn to be the "victim" of stress.

Last time, i was very confidence or i should say that i never been so fear of the subject that i studied. I feel that the subject is just ok for me to studied and it will not be too difficult. The same feeling goes to my degree. At 1st, i really feel that the subject we are taking is quite easy cause we had alsready studied before in foundation. However, once i receive my result for the math....OH GOD!!! I actually failed my math. I never fail before but then this is the 1st time and its the subject i like very very very much... How can it be like this?? What have actually happen to me?? Is it because this study environment over here?? I dun think so because i do not fail any other subject. Then, the problem shoud be lies on 1 person--LIM YONG CHIANG!!

The result of my math keep on flying over my eyes whenever i study. Just like yesterday, Im having a econ test on monday, so i study on sun. Actually before that i have read a few times, on friday and twice on saturday. and on the same day-sunday, i also have already studied twice, once in the morning, and once at the evening. But then i just feel that its not enough. I re-studied again after i watch 2 series of movies. That moment, when i studied alone in the room, where everyone maybe is sleeping, i saw the marks keep on running out and pass through my notes. I tried to sleep but when i think about my result, i woke up again and continue read till finished.

I was once thinking in my mind. "How can I teach other people since my result is poorer than others?? Is it that I'm 装聪明 ??" I was too embarresed to teach other people since i get my result. Its was like a kind of insulting myself. Sorry for those who had asked me before but I dont answer. I not dont want just scared of something.

A poor result is unacceptable for me in this 3-year degree program because I have a lot of things to take care of!! I cant affored to fail even passing also unaffordable:

1) I'm now taking the schorlarship, if i fail once, the schorlarship will be withdrawn.

2) If the scholar is withdrawn, i will need to use my parents money

3) I dont want to use their money to study, i want to prove my strenght to them as i dont want them to worry about me!!

4) I still have one sister and two brother, so if possible, i want my parents to use money on them but not me, because i dont want to burden my parents, ITS not easy to earn $ but then we(children) are there to spend it like pipe water.

Good Or Bad ??

Today, i was having a class on 12-2pm for microeconomics, but the class ended at 1.30pm. The most "interesting" is that one of my friend(don't know to say cute or what), she was like a kindergarden student, at the moment the lecturer start the class is finished, she immediately put her hand up and shout,"Miss, our class finished at 2pm!!" However, the lecturer replied,"Yes, but i have finished the lecture and that all for today topic!" Errr, so disappointed for us because we will only have class on 5pm which is very.....!!!

Just because i had nothing to do, my friend and I went to the block A to attend the buddhist society activity. Wahhh, its was quite a boring and like tipu-ing thing to tell people. I remembered what the teacher advisor actually said when he was giving his speech. He said, "according to the don't know what statistic, the monk is the happiest people in the world. This is because they were having the good attitude, good thought and good...good...good... things!! So they were living happily." The teacher advisor also hoped that we as the Buddhist society member will also be the happiest people in the UTAR life !!

At that moment, I don't know why i would have that kind of thinking.
I was thinking that the monk can live happily because they were interacting with the same people everyday. And those people were having the same: Good attitude, Good thought, Good ..... Ohhhh, that's why they can live so happy !!
In the real life, would we be live in that kind of environment ?? I have no answer for it but from my point of view, I don't THINK so!! Nowadays, in the polluted society we will never live like that again. If we were being that kind and good manner, we will definitely being hurt by those heartless people !! Doing good things without hoping for return is the nature BUT doing good things and get the bad and Zerk-ark result, its very yam gong !!
You will know it but you never realise it as this will happen in your daily life. Let's put yourself in this situation, when you were in the mood of helping other people, and you maybe get rejected so badly and keep on being insulted by that people, you will feel that its no point for helping people. The only thing you will feel its that,"Next time don't be so CHICKEN-GRAND-MA!!"

Oh…Here’s the place…

Kampar, its like a ulu kampung that ha nothing in it. Its full of bulls and buffalo, and the road is the most beautiful artistic in the city, it is clean from any rubbish, but full of those organic “things” that was made by the bull there. You can see all those SAI in the road and if you are not careful enough when you were driving in that artistic road, you will definitely kena those SAI.

Kampar, the place you can see the view of the nearby mountain even if you are vertically challenged. You will not able to see your weakness here as there do not have any high and tall building that can block your view.

Kampar, when you look at the picture from the internet you will feel that it’s a good, nice and harmony place to stay as here is not like a busy city. You will have no stress here, feel relax and the most is have boring day in the house in the weekend. People here are worked in the slow-motion motion mode as they will have no other things to do if they finish the work today. This is the problem that us, as a student can’t accept. We have already learn to do thing in a fast, hurry, rush, and accurate mode (maybe this is the life as a student).
It’s true that you will love with the environment here because of the green mountains, blue sky and blue lake with a peaceful-style environment. For me, I agree that it’s free from stress but I hate the things that will happen here. For example, around 7pm every night, you have closed all the window as there will have a lot of insect that will come for you. I hated all those little little things that live around me.

Besides, there were a lot of weird things happen around us. “Thing” that we never face before. My friend told me that his room got something weird happen when he was sleeping at night, the most scary is that that thing will only happen once a week. Last Monday night, he boiled cattle of water and then left it there on his table without closed the main switch. Then, he switch off the light before when to bed. At that time, he still sms with his friend and still haven’t closed his both eyes. Later, he heard his cattle reboil the water again and heard “tiak” sound means that his water was cook. He said that, he had confirmed that his water was cooked before he switch off the light. Is there any explanation for that?

One more case, its my female friends. She told me that she felt her room was being visited by unknown visitor on that night. At 1st, she was scared and want to slept in her friend room, then she felt that her room was too “ke lian” and “yam gong” if she left it like that. Then, she decided to slept back in her own room. She said, if she din slept in her room that night, it will means that she let the unknown visitor to stay at her room overnight. That night, she was stay awake till 4am in the morning. She was so tired that till have no mood to sleep. (maybe she no mood because of the unknown visitor.)

That “thing”, although it is a intangible, unknown, uninvited, invisible “people”, I seem like not that scared about those “thing”, but I scared that stupid insects that live around my area. Its all KANASAI !!!

Should Carried On?? Or should left it be??

Still have 2weeks more, im going to Kampar ler for my degree course. 3years life at there will I be bored mati?? Its quite a “enjoyable” life as you wont find any shopping complex at there, moreover the town there quite “ulu” also, not have that new or fresh smell there, feel like staying at PJ better. PJ, I had my foundation there and quite enjoy, every week go shopping complex such as wan utama, mid-valley, times square, the curve, sungai wang. Wah, quite enjoy rite? Also duno come here for study or go shopping? Haiz, the $ in the pocket and bank also keep on bleeding none-stop as the money always dikorek by me!!

Here's the picture of the road and place near the place where im going to study:



A long and big road but u can see nothing except trees beside it.










Beautiful view of the mountain. see it for 1095 days!







Ahhhh!! All is trees, no building except the The Grand Kampar Hotel.








Path beside the lake, beautiful right? Try walk for 3years.

Now u go see the Kampar picture, especially the bus-stop and the bus there. Its looks like the time when we were still having the World War 2. The age of the bus-stop and the bus must be older than me and can become the museum of the Kmapar, the government can save up the money to built a museum for the Kampar city. Cz the citizen will found the museum there. Wah, so long-sighted thinking !!

The "Museum" in Kampar !!!

Although saying that I will be having my degree course, but I still wondering whether to take that course or not. I scared it’s a waste if I take that course. Some of my friends say that it’s a waste if I take that course, they say I should be taking the course of engineering or some course that related to science subject. I keep on and keep on telling them that I very very very very and very hate science subject since I was in Form4. Cz I never pass my science subject in the school exam, jz a few times pass nia, but also very low passing marks(60something). Then I had been went to the counseling room to ask the counselor to confirm which path should I take. The counselor ask me whether I like the science subject? I answer “NO”! then he say I should take the Foundation program 1st if I still not sure which course I want to choose. However, now, I got a little regret to take the foundation programme in UTAR. Not that UTAR not good. Its that I cant make my own decisions on which course to choose. The counselor said that if which subject is the best in the result then u should choose that course, but now?? How ?? I really duno how to choose. Thinking and thinking again I should carry on my course that I have choose earlier cz I really dun like science subject. Although I get not bed result in SPM but I really had my hard time to study them, not like now, in the foundation programme, I feel no stress and can be that happy the whole day when studying those not that critical subject. However, should I ?? should I carried it on because I dun like the science subject?? I dun have that much of time to retake and retake the course again. There is no experiment in the life, once you have choose the road, you should have carried it on till the end of your life!!

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;